Welcome back everyone! Prepare yourself for Part 7 in our 19-part FinerMinds series on Becoming Just Awesome. Today we’re going to cover comfort – in particular, your comfort zone. When most people think about comfort they think positive thoughts. Words like ‘soothing’, ‘calming’ and ‘secure’ pop into their minds.

There’s actually a dark side to comfort.

Remember that your mind is desperately trying to keep you as safe as possible. It doesn’t want you to experience anything new to rock the status quo. So, you basically do the same things every day – you eat the same food, you watch TV at the same time, you drive the same route, you chat to the same friends, you do the same activities. You’re living in a comfort bubble, AND YOU’RE NOT GROWING!

And there’s a very easy method to determine whether you’re outside of your comfort zone. Do you feel any fear? Feeling the fear every now and then is a very good thing. It means you’re onto something new. It means you’re challenging yourself. It means you’re growing. The trick is to keep doing this particular thing until the fear subsides, and you’ve achieved a certain level of mastery. Then it’s time to move onto the next project.

T. Harv Eker goes so far as to call your comfort zone your cage.

He explains beautifully the idea of how, as you expand your comfort zone, you actually grow as a person to fill out these new boundaries. It makes sense. If you have a larger comfort zone, and continue to push the edges of it out, you really do grow as an individual – you have more experiences, more learning, and more wisdom.

You also need to be aware that it is YOU who created the bars of your comfort cage. No one else. It’s time to take responsibility and start bending, and even removing, the bars to the cage.

DO THE FOLLOWING EXCERISES TO EXPAND YOUR COMFORT ZONE:

1. Do the Unexpected

Take a minute to think about who you are–specifically focus on your personality. Are you generally quiet and rather shy? Or are you the extrovert who loves a constant crowd? The exercise is to do something out of character. What would raise your friends’ eyebrows and make them say, “No way. ______ did that!” (In a good way, of course!). If you’re a quiet mouse, host a dinner party. For some this would be the easiest task in the world. For a limelight avoider this might be pure terror. Do it anyway! If you’re a gregarious creature and the idea of a blank social calendar causes your pulse to race, perhaps you should try going to a silent meditation retreat on your own.

2. Travel

There is no better way to shake things up in your world than to take a trip that makes you a little bit nervous. Understand that I’m not referring to the same comfortable vacation routine that you’ve become accustomed over the last decade. I’m talking about plopping yourself down in a place where you’re confronted with a new language, foods, climate, practices, etc. You’ll soon understand how predictable your daily routine truly is. I’ve been lucky enough to travel to India three times for work, and once I get off that plane, I’m forced to surrender my previous way of life. I’m challenged to learn how to go with the flow. A cage-expanding experience.

3. Eat Something Different

When it comes to food, most of us are on autopilot. We cook the same meals week after week. Even when we visit restaurants (usually the same restaurants), we order the same things. (Both my husband and I recently recognized we’re guilty of this.) This is an easy exercise: try something new! This tiny act will break up your routine. And there are other small routine-breakers you can try: take a different route to work, have lunch with a different group once and a while, take a break from TV for a week.

4. Tackle a Fear

This is probably the hardest exercise on the list. Many of you have fears. It could be anything: flying, public speaking, sharing your feelings, swimming. You’ve actually become comfortable with this fear. This fear has become a part of your identity. You fail to challenge this fear anymore. This isn’t good. Irrational fears make you weak. So, the challenge is to isolate the fear and chip away at it until you can manage it and it doesn’t manage you. Consciously confront it. If you’re petrified of public speaking, throw yourself in the ring and join Toastmasters. My brother, who’s in his final year of law school, is taking a practical course where he has to actually defend people in the courtroom. It’s real. Being a bit nervous of public speaking, he joined Toastmasters to combat his speaking nerves. Every week he’s getting more and more comfortable in the courtroom (and he’s won his last three cases against seasoned lawyers).

5. Learn Something New

You’ve probably been doing the same activities for years. That’s lovely, but why not add something new to the mix? You’re not learning and growing if you’ve been doing something for so long you can practically accomplish it in your sleep. There are so many interesting things out there to learn: pottery, languages, knitting, singing, ballet, poetry, carpentry, reflexology, poetry, cooking, karate, etc. And no, you’re not too old. My father, who’s in his late 60s, started taking Japanese lessons after he retired as well as teaching judo, a sport he learned in his youth. Moreover, when you take a class, you’ll meet a circle of likeminded souls: curious, fun individuals eager to learn something new. An added bonus!

And remember, I’m not saying to discard your old way of life, the things you truly enjoy. It’s about adding to and expanding what you already have going on to ensure growth continues.

So, what are you doing to expand your comfort cage?

Read the entire FinerMinds’ “Becoming Just Awesome” series here »